... for my behavior. Maybe you don't particularly care as to how I've behaved, or as to my reasons for it - but I do. If for no other reason, I'm apologizing to set the record straight, rather than to ask for forgiveness.

I recently tried to match the sheer volume of contrarian opinions posted here. In particular, I tried to match the responses of one specific poster (may she remain nameless) for a single "work day" - that is, an 8-hour period from 8:30AM to 4:30PM EST. The task involved responding to every post made by this person with just as much sincerity as they put in to it.

Several things happened during this period. I went through a number of emotional changes which slowly evolved over time. They included dull amusement, anger, wonderment and bitter self-loathing of a type I'd not experience prior to this experiment. I also found "anticipation" at the prospect of coming up with a snarky dismissal of this person's post, and though I shudder to admit it, this is what kept me motivated for the entire time period.

I also found that after roughly 3 hours, I got nauseous. There was a noticeable feeling of disgust at my own behavior, even though part of me was enjoying it. I'm sure both Christians and atheists might impart significance at this, but for me it simply was. I disliked treating people the way I was being treated, and knowing I'd have to keep it up for a full work-day made me feel bad.

At the end of this period, I stopped responding to the person. Perhaps significantly, I noticed the person had stopped posting a half hour before I did. We'd both spent the day posting as soon and as often as we'd seen the other person respond. I attribute this synchronicity to our effort required to maintain the acrimony.

After only a single day of matching her behavior, I've concluded that my antagonist is mentally unstable. No healthy person could maintain the sheer volume of contrarian bigotry without being negatively impacted by it. While I was able to keep this up for an entire day without any lasting affects, I can't imagine the same behavior day-after-day being indicative of a healthy mind.

I apologize to the Secular Forums posters, independent of their theology. I wont repeat the experiment, both for their sake and my own.